This is the most important post I have ever posted- since I began on Facebook over 6 years ago.
It’s 324am on Sunday 28/01/2018. My daughter and I have just had our first ever deep discussion about that awful night, back in 2000 when we were both violated mental , emotionally and me physically.
Wow there were deep breaths, tears and clarification. I found out tonight that she has some patterns that she operates with based on that experience. Damn -its all making sense now. I also got to share some of the remnants of mine with her and we both recognise that some of our similarities are based on the same event.
Thankfully, I got to touch subjects and areas of that whole ordeal, I have been too afraid to touch with her , because I wasnt sure of how much she remembered.
To my surpise , she remembered more than I could imagine. Yes when she was 7 she had flashbacks for the first time and voiced it then, but overall we have not revisited it the way we did just now. What makes it even more easy on me, is the fact that she is now almost 20 with a wider perspective of the world. It was uncomfortable but #necessary ..sometimes necessary is not the easiest but has to be done.
I feel so relieved, my heart is lighter and sadly she ended by saying she can’t watch #themangogirl but I get that.
I am going to bed now, feeling safe in the fact that – she too is safe and relieved in her heart . She has always been my soldier , we have been through a lot together and she has a deeply rooted special place in my being.
My heart is cleansed and my soul revived.