Eradicating Negative Self-Talk
If negative self-talk came with an off switch, you could just flip it. But unfortunately for us humans it doesn’t. It takes a plan and some work to tone it down and eventually hopefully eradicate it. I have had my own share of negative thoughts at different stages of my life namely: As a child I had negative thoughts of being unworthy and not good enough to even have been born
As a teenager I felt overly displaced
As a wife feeling that my husband at the time was far too good for me based on the family he was from and my level of insecurities
Having moved to London and getting totally confused and regretful of where my life was, in comparison to where I wanted to be
What I have come to understand, is that negative self-talk and thoughts will not help you as a person, instead it robs you of a healthy and fulfilled life. Subsequently, I have shed and turned the switch off a number of years ago. It’s one of the best things I have ever done for my family and I. Ever since I have done that my life has taken a very different path.
Here are four ways I made it happen:
Distance yourself.
When you find yourself having negative thoughts distance yourself and step back. You can’t banish negative self-talk forever, but you can take a step back from it.
Distract yourself.
Get busy when negative thoughts start creeping upon you. Lyubomirsky says. “You can stop that train of thought by focusing on something else.” Try playing music, cooking, get busy and do something you enjoy doing and fully engage your mind. If you give your negative thoughts the third-degree and they could crumble.
Save them for later.
It may sound silly but if you MUST have negative thoughts save them for a nonproductive part of the day. That way , it doesn’t stop you being productive.
Set aside a time of day for negative self-talk. If you hear yourself doubting, blaming, or comparing yourself to others at another time of day, tell yourself you will come back to the conversation later. When the appointed time arrives, your negative thoughts may have lost most of their oomph.
Tell yourself to shut up
When negative self-talk comes up, tell it to shut up as you would if someone said something rude to you. Now to be honest, shut up isn’t how I would react to anyone but it’s a language many understand. Therefore, treat your negative self-thought as you would an enemy.
I will be the first to say it isn’t instantaneous, but as they say repetition makes learning easier and if you repeat these steps above the recurrence may get less.
Until next time keep positive thoughts.
This is Ava Brown signing off for now.
If you want my help in eradicating negative thoughts drop me an email at info@avabrown.org
